Fun Saturday....

The leadership workshop was pretty good....better than I expected really...even though the facilitator is intense...but I think she's an acquired taste...lol, aren't we all?
Speaking of personality types...strengths...and weaknesses....it was interesting to see that most people that I was in a group with consider that I'm slow adapting to change...am I? Hmmmm....I know I complain alot...maybe that's it....the dominant side was very obvious though...and in the workplace...I think it's a good trait...keeping in mind though that all extremes are harmful....
I'll ask him to take the DISC for fun...because I think I already know what his predominant trait is...especially when they spoke about hedonism...lol. The whole profiling thing is good...helps you understand people alot more...and it ends the whole...who I like who I don't like...and it makes it more along the lines of...different types of people...and they should be accepted, and we need to work on understanding them and approaching them in a way that's effective....hmmm, I think I did learn something today....
As far as acting today...was great too...was a little late....that wasn't too good...but no biggie because I caught right on...and got great reviews on my singing...and my portrayal of a dying mosquito...LOL. Me and dying...it was so much fun...and there go my knees with so much collapsing onto the wooden floors of the stage....
Being the kind of person that tends to use the upper side of my brain...I can see how being so quick and intense....can sometimes be uncomfy for other people...and I can come off as being a know it all....even when that's not the intention...at action class...I think I'm already stereotyped as this wealthy snob....by the looks of the folks there...lol, oh well...guess I'll have to work on being nice....lol
Gosh, I really ate alot....only english muffins for breakfast...and nothing up until maybe 5 pm...lol, the hamburger and cheesecake that I downed hit me like a ton of bricks! No dinner for me! I need to start the whole cleaning/packing thing...but, as soon as I've digested a bit....
It seems that I have a lot of alone time on Saturday's...feels odd...the house is so quiet...but I like it. Girls are out with cousins....son is out with a friend....and I'm here....lol, being a loony person typing my thoughts of the day....very productive...lol, well....it actually is!
30 days after Thursday....and 20 some days after Thursday....yay! The fun begins! Well...the fun actually begins this week with the move....I'm thinking it's more Thursday than Tuesday...by the look of things...either way...as long as it's this week...we're good. Yawns....yep, I'm tired....no thought of a nap though...would kill my tummy...I've learned that lesson well....
I'm surprised at how comfy I feel on stage...I thought I'd be a little edgy...but it feels like home...lol, and I think these classes are great for reducing stress...after each session...I feel light....
Was told I've lost some weight...woohoo! Need to keep this up....looking good! I'm still looking at starting the fake bake thing this week...hope I can...I have less than a month, for my beach trip.....omgoodness....shopping for new stuff for the apartment...settling everything in...ok, I'm getting excited now....it's such a nice building...and so close to everything...not so noisy...I hope...lol...and did I mention closer to everything? Won't have to wait forever to get home...kids will have friends that can drive them home without feeling like they're driving them to the US....
New maid seems ok...kids like her...she's always smiling...and the apartment is organized....counting my blessings here...looks like I'm on a roll...please keep it up...I like it all so much better this way!
My eyes are getting tired here...looks like bitching gives me more energy than happiness...lol, when I'm on a negative spree...the words just pour...but now...I sit and pause...and feel tired...and wonder what to say next....
I'm thankful today...of everything that has happened to me in my life...sounds lame...but it's true...it's brought me here...even the crap...but, I feel in a good place today....this feeling hasn't been familiar to me...but I can sense it becoming more frecuent than it has been before...baby steps...but it's a good start....
I wonder how he is...has to be tough, what's going on over there...very emotional....I'm glad I'm out of my analysis spell, so I don't have to add any unnecessary grief....but, that's the way life is...people grow on you...you care for them..and one day...they have to go....we can only hope that we go first...to not suffer...but then have others suffer for us? Not really sure which is the least of evils....
Death isn't something I can really think too much about without becoming overly anxious of even depressed...because in all honesty....to make such efforts to improve...to live life the way it's supposed to...only to leave it? Doesn't really make much sense....to love people and lose them....sighs....it just sucks...but, it's one of those things out of our control...really hate those...would love to control it all...lol.
But imagine living forever...not fun either...same ole same ole...forever and ever...lol....so, I guess there's some logic to it...but the bad ways of going...the diseases...accidents....don't like any of it.
I can't think of anything that I am more afraid of than dying....well, that someone I adore dies too....I can't even fathom the possibility of losing my children....would go crazy....yeah, not something I want to think about any further....death is hard...but, life is harder...lol
I like it though...my life these days...as irresponsable...wreckless...and hypocritical as it might seem to some...or would seem to some..if they really knew what went on inside my head...but...I feel good....and as selfish as that sounds...that's all that matters...
They spoke about values today...and I do have them...I don't consider myself to be a careless type of person...I've made peace though with those wants and desires of mine...that don't fit into the moral plan...that someone laid out there....and , it's my life...noone elses...so, it's ok for me.
I'd do it all over again....because I've gained so much more than what I have lost...but as beauty..I guess that's all in the eye of the beholder...and will depend on the lense you're looking at my life with...
I'm thinking the kind that allows me to sleep at night....and I know I might be in denial and stretching it....but it's working....at least for right now....
What I want...exceeds by far my thoughts of what should or shouldn't be...and who is to say what should be? It is after all...my life...
I have to live with me....24/7 for the rest of my days...so at the end of the day...I have to be ok with me...and I am....with my flaws and all...and on days like today...especially because of my flaws....it adds spice to who I am....lol
Ok, enough rambling for today....signing off, until we meet again.