Random thoughts...

Today I woke up with the whole thyroid thing on my mind...but just got back from the doctor and it all seems to be ok....it's more of a digestion issue than anything else...so, I need to watch what I eat and slowly start exercising again...walking, I'd think...so this weekend will be fun....I just hope it doesn't rain...
So the day started out kind of blah...but it's wrapping up pretty well....my work day was great....gave breaks left and right...everyone was happy...and ended up with doughuts galore....who can say no to sweets?
Speaking of which...I've gained weight! Ewwww...it's all that darn triple dream chocolate pudding I recently discovered....wow, it's amazing!
Three layers of darker, medium and milky chocolate that just melts in your mouth...talk about comfort food....yum!!!
But...it's all ending up on my belly and tush....yuck! Need to get that all under control again....will power is all....lol....
Straightened out a situation at the office....people and their emotions...I'm proud of the fact that I can handle them so well during most work related situations...handling personnel and all that....I just wish some of my direct reports would learn a little quicker...lol...but oh well...I have several flaws too....
Grey's anatomy is almost on....I wonder if it'll be another good episode....last week was fantastic!
I'm a housewife! Threw clothes in the washer this morning...just tossed them in the dryer when I walked in....have all plastic dishes, cups and cutlery...and am having sandwiches for dinner...can't get more practical than that...am cleaning and fixing up the house before I go to work...yay for me...lol....I'm a normal person....not sure that's a good thing...lol...
Great reviews on my look today....spectacular an agent said...LOL...like a movie star...another one....lol..I must look like crap ordinarilly if today's look made such an impression....hehehe...nah, I did put in an extra little something....and agree that I was looking good...
Lunch was very good...sushi again....really enjoy it...the wasabi rush is so much fun....
Two and a half men is on...my son loves it...very funny show....
The kids drove me nuts at the doctors....it seems like they're the main characters of these posts...venting on my parenting opportunities and my lack of motherly patience....aren't we all supposed to have it built in...when they're born??
They just never seem to stop...maybe I'm too flexible? Maybe they need more activities? I'm having them start hap kido again next week...keep them busy and let's them vent all of that energy....and the little one is starting with them...she doesn't want ballet...oh well, this will probably help her more....
I adore these kids...when I thought that something might be wrong with me...I couldn't think straight....and now...that I know that I'm fine...I'm back to wondering how the heck I'm going to survive motherhood...LOL...
I need a dish of tolerance with an extra side of patience....lots of it....
I figure that if I've learned it at work....a bit...that I should be able to apply at home...but it's so different....like I don't have the tools to see things so cut and dry here....too much emotion...sheesh....wish I could give some of mine away....
Hubby's been helping since the maid left...good house cleaning teamwork...it's a good thing that he's always been good at that...likes to cook....and isn't just used to being waited on....
It's made my part in it all a little easier....
We're still in a good place....makes everything so much better....he's thinking about taking a week off...I'm going to look into maybe spending the weekend somewhere....weather permitting...and if my aunt looks after the little demons....would be nice...some alone time...it's been a long time...not since our anniversary almost a year ago...wow...lol....time flies..
Girls getaway in May cancelled....my gfd has too much going on...but we're maybe going to plan to get together by the end of June...we'll see how that plays out....I'm running out of ideas here...lol....
But, if things are meant to be...they'll happen...if not...oh well...
It's not like it's a burning want these days anyway....
Nice if it happens...not earth shattering if it doesn't....
So....middle daughter runs in....crying...she was brushing her new doll's hair and bored son feels the urge to go and mess it all up....geeze! Does it ever end???? Patience.....patience....patience.....
I see myself growing old very quickly at this pace....if I make it to an old age at all with all of this aggravation....
I've read that it will pass....I just hope I can stand being around them when this whole teenage crap passes....I don't need much to be rattled and this is sometimes more than I can handle...it makes me angry....
Makes it hard to enjoy the good moments when all they do is pester around the clock....and I'm not an expert at sibling interaction at all...being raised an only child myself....boy and I thought I had it bad...being alone was a blessing...lol...
I want to write about him....but I really don't know what to say.....not much to be said, I think.....in two words...it's fine....nothing really going on...so no way to not be fine....lol. I should feel relieved because it doesn't really feel like an affair....certainly doesn't look like one...or sound like one....
I think it's interesting that he'd ask what I see in him.....I think often about what he sees in me too....we probably both wonder....with things being as they are....lol...maybe I just do...don't think he wonders much at all....but won't assume....should know better by now....the hell with it...I'm just writing my thoughts...so I can assume whatever I want!
I guess....I don't always understand it.....I guess I picture this type of situation to have some more passion to it....intensity....knock your socks off kinda feeling....can't get enough of him kinda thing....maybe it's the distance...because I know I've felt it......it's just been awhile....
Maybe in time....when he's realized that I'm not going anywhere.....and that I'm not flip flopping...and he truly believes that this isn't a game for me....he'll feel more comfortable opening up....that would be nice....in time....
Deleting the rest of that ramble....lol....no thinking required....one day at a time....wait and see....
Patience...patience...patience....
Thought of buying a novel to start reading today....maybe tomorrow....would like to read a whole book....has been too long of a time....and stories are good for the soul.....they take you places....it's fun...
Ok so....eat healthier and not so much...and more exercise are my May resolutions....make the team happier and keep them motivated...are some others....try to see the bright side of things as much as I can....and smile alot!
Not take things to heart....and give people the benefit of the doubt...even when it smells rotten...lol...close one eye and pretend not to see the obvious at times....and go to my happy place at least once a day....
Do things that make me happy...and look for more interesting places and people to fill my life....
Keep in touch with my friends and travel....meeting my gfd would really make me happy...girl talk...need that sometimes....really like it....
Not focus on one person or place or thing....keep my life options open...
Not limit myself....look for opportunities...
That Bingo thing at the club looks interesting and it'll be girls night out...yay!
And keep smiling...lots and lots....
Remind myself of how wonderful life is....and how many great people I care about and care about me there are....not limit myself...lol.
Keep going...and growing....and living....to the fullest....
Get to know myself more and more.....by trying new things....meeting new people...going to new places....not limit myself....lol....
Give more....without expecting....but keeping in mind that everything is about balance....
Love myself more and more....as I discover more of me....not limit myself....
Enjoy the simple things in life.....and see the beauty in as much as I can...
Not judge....or frown upon the things I don't understand....not limit myself....
Remember that each breath is a new beginning....every day a new opportunity....and that I hold the keys....and the map to the rest of my life....not limit myself....
Lots of resolutions....lol....hopefully I'll check them off one by one....little by little....just reading them over and over should be fun...especially on the bad days.....and with the rainy days...they'll be more frequent....lol...yuck.
Stretches.....and yawns....I'm writing myself into a sleepy mood....
Grey's is on in a few minutes....and then keep busy until he gets home...
Everything is in it's place....and dinner is a no brainer today.....hope the kids are in bed early so him and I can spend some time....talk about the day....and just hang out.....it's relaxing....
I see so much good in him lately.....lol...not even getting into that analysis....but I have to say that I appreciate him alot more....
His dedication....and affection.....a touch....a caress....a smile and a deep look into one's eyes goes a long way....
Deleting more unproductive thoughts....lol....maybe I'll write them out one day....but not today....
I'll review my resolutions before I go to bed...and probably every day after that....lol.....they sure do look good written down....let's see how they measure up out in the real world....
Kids acting up now...time to go....lol...was good while it lasted....my alone time....
Until the next one....Becca signing off...peace out...LOL.